Perfect strangers, Rachell Sumpter and Corey Arnold, meet in Norway in search of whale killing and snow.
Two complete strangers, one a painter, the other a photographer
searched the arctic in hopes meeting nomadic reindeer herders and
shifty whalers and seal hunters of Northern Norway. They talk here via
instant message about their journey.
Drawings by Rachell Sumpter
Photos by Corey Arnold
Corey Arnold------
That photo of us jumping looks kind of gay. I mean you look
kind of gay in it. In both a queer way and a happy way.
But it kind of sums up the trip right. It was like this
the whole time right? Gay... in a happy way.
Thanks Corey....Yes, that was a happy trip. Definetly, lots of singing around the campfire...
Corey Arnold------
Maybe we should talk about how we didn't even know each
other? I think that is interesting and weird that you came
all the way to Norway and we only emailed a few times
before.
rachell sumpter------
I sent an email to Corey asking if he'd trade a photo for a
painting, his reply went something like "dude, you paint
Sami, come to Norway and we'll find them"... so I went...
my gut said I should go, plus there were some really odd
coincidences that seemed to be pushing things along too.
Maybe it's a little weird you invited me though.
Corey Arnold------
I was thinking you could be a no strings attached piece of
meat... oh... did I type that outloud? I mean, I felt it was
my duty to help a nice artist from the big city to escape
into worlds that maybe they would never.... damn, I can't be
serious... just kidding about the piece of meat.
rachell sumpter------
Don't be serious. anyway, strings are for yo-yo's, I just get
tangled up in them.
Corey Arnold------
Exactly, was that too bad of a joke... not funny...sorry...
what would my parents think... ah, take that out please...
my family is already almost banishing me for the dog
humping little kid photo on my website....
So, weren't you worried that this Corey guy was going to be
a lame redneck?
rachell sumpter------
Redneck didn't cross my mind, maybe that you might turn me
into crab bait though. When I told a friend who knew you
that I was vacillating about going and she said "Oh Corey,
don't worry he's a nice guy. watch him on the deadliest
catch, you'll see." So I watched an episode...you seemed
nerdy and funny, in a very good way...at least that's the
way it was edited.
Corey Arnold------
So you saw me on TV and thought I was nerdy enough not to
be a lame redneck? That's cool.
rachell sumpter------
Rednecks are okay. they just see things a little
differently. I definitely prefer funny nerds though.
Corey Arnold------
But you thought I was more nerdy than tough. I wanna be
thought of as tough. You think I'm tough... right... right?
rachell sumpter------
Course I think you're tough, t-u-f-f tough! I trusted you
to be my guide through the arctic, that alone says alot.
Corey Arnold------
It was kind of an experiment, I guess.... to invite you
over. Just seemed like we're onto the same subjects...
animals, hunting, arctic folk.... shark riding... Plus you
said that you were willing to kill seals with a gun. That's
pretty tough. I mean, It can be tough to kill defenseless
sea creatures as long as they are bigger then you, right?
Anyway, I was just joking when I invited you over... but
you just bought the plane ticket. It was out of my hands.
rachell sumpter------
That sealed the deal? Lies Corey. You lured me with "Ive
got this great photo job, we'll have free places to stay
and food to eat" ect..then your job fell through and I
tried to back out, but you were persistently adamant that
it would be awesome, and you were right...Even without the
seals.
Corey Arnold------
Sealed.... I get it. Yeah, we had high hopes to kill some
large mammals or at least witness it... whaling,
sealing...but bad weather prevented our seal hunter
connection from taking the boat out. He was a real happy
guy though. He was so excited to tell me about the 20
seals he shot last week near the North Cape. They were
those really ugly seals that have horse heads. It's
probably more fun to kill ugly seals then the cute spotted
ones... I would imagine.
rachell sumpter------
We did hunt masa eggs, on towering lichen
crusted cliffs and gave them to the Sami...then we met
these insane roadside trolls and found lamb carnage on the
wayside- not our doing, not at all, it was probably the
trolls.
Corey Arnold------
No one knows what masa eggs are, Rachell. Plus you spelled
it wrong. Its "Maase" eggs and since we are doing this
conversation story thing about our trip in English, we
should probably just refer to them as "Seagull Eggs". Last
year, I got picked up hitchhiking in Finnmark by this
family that was visiting grandma for dinner... they invited
me along and we went on a bulimic frenzy.... eating fried
cod tongues and seagull eggs. I didn't know it was gonna be
a bulimic episode though until after dinner.
rachell sumpter------
Gross, Corey. Sorry about my phonetical Norwegian
spelling, grandparents weren't very good about making sure
the family kept our native tounge.
Corey Arnold------
Yeah.... Who knew you could eat seagull eggs? Have you ever
thought of picking seagull eggs in SF?
rachell sumpter------
No way. I don't even hunt fish here, but I live in the
Richmond district and some of the restruant's have very
exotic dishes. Theres a strong possiblity Mosse is on a
menu nearby.
Corey Arnold------
Not a chance... I would imagine they are full of a million PCBs in
Cali. Much healthier in the Arctic... you never even tasted 'em
huh?
rachell sumpter------
Next time....What was going on between you and that fish?
Corey Arnold------
What fish? Seagull eggs are the best and the yolk is two
toned... Orange and yellow.
rachellsumpter------
Sounds yummy. You know, the giant frozen fish on a stick.
Corey Arnold------
Who doesn't want a photo next to a giant frozen fish on the
side of the road? Next question....
rachell sumpter------
...okay, but I saw you two making out...
Corey Arnold------
That's not funny. I don't make out with fake fish.
What was up with your balance though during the trip?
It was all those boat trips...four? five? six? They threw my equilibrium off, couldn't shake the sea legs and was falling over like a drunk bird. Finally, I just gave up fighting it and hid out in the grass for awhile, that was nice.
The one where you hit your head on the roof of the little shack. bummer.
It hurt a little, I'm fine now, why are you bringing it up, still grumpy about the outhouse ransack?
Corey Arnold------
my pants were down... you cheated. I collided with the
inside of the stall upon impact. I was trying to take a
nice calm picture of me pooping in an arctic outhouse....
and suddenly you were there... like an angry flying
squirrel... ruining my aarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.
Just fox, no squirrel, can't help it, besides I kept waiting and waiting, then when you asked me to bring a Fisherman's Life Mag over...well...that brought the claws out...things were becoming way to comfy between us... besides you need it, your life is way to easy
Corey Arnold------
Yeah, my life is a cakewalk. I get to cruise around the
world and take naked pictures of everything all the time
and drink bubbly water.... what's the problem?
rachell sumpter------
Exactly...boat cruises in Alaska, catch a few crabs, fly to
Oslo, take pictures of your naked friends, drink frent
branco all day...comfy.
Corey Arnold------
You mean Farnet Branca? You call yourself sophisticated?
rachellsumpter------
Sofitikated? Not at all, Im a simple woman.
Corey Arnold------
I like how you said "catch a few crabs" like "It's a
beautiful day... sigh... I'm just gonna take a walk to the
seashore and pluck me out a couple of nice king crabs
today". What about your life? You've obviously got all the
time in the world to take off on random trips around the
world with complete strangers.
rachell sumpter------
Time?...I saw one episode and you were sorta just hanging
around, isn't that how it is to be a crab fisherman in
Alaska--easy peasy right?
Corey Arnold------
Do you ever work? Maybe you have assistants painting for
you? I tried having an assistant... but they always quit
when I start throwing polaroids at them.
rachell sumpter------
I was just kidding about crabbing being easy. that job's
insane, but at this point I'm sure whatever they pay you
isn't. why you do it?...assistants can't paint the dots, takes
infinite amounts of mindless restraint, now I working
almost twenty four hours a day....What's wrong
with flying polariods, the sharp edges? Sounds like fun.
Corey Arnold------
You're the master at dot painting I think, but maybe you're
the only dot painter I know. But still you're good at
painting dots. Back to the assistants.... If they aren't
fully attentive. I throw things at them. They always
deserve it though. They just aren't able to look outside
the box enough to know that I'm always right. They just
quit. Wimps...
rachell sumpter------
Thanks, expert dot painter doesnt sound like much compared
to what you do though. Neil Farber's work has many dots too,
I love dots!....Maybe you should be nice Corey, kill'em
with kindness...or you could just hire me, Im t-u-f-f too.
Corey Arnold------
Ok I will... who is Neil Farber?
rachell sumpter------
Neil Farber? He's a talented painter guy, lives in Winnipeg
I think, part of the Royal Art Lodge.
Corey Arnold------
Wow. Neat.
Rachell Sumpter------
Yes, yes. We're getting sidetracked again, maybe we should
talk about the trip?
Corey Arnold------
This is just like reality tv but in text. Conversation
reality. Could it be the new interview?
rachell sumpter------
Yes, we'll invent a new interviewing genre- The Arnold
Sumpter interview style, or is it the Arnsumpchat method?
Corey Arnold------
Sumpnold....let's do a Sumpnold. Can you guys do a Sumpnold
for the next Believer?
rachell sumpter------
Sumpnold tickles when you say it out loud...Ha you're rad
Corey Arnold------
add ical to the end of that and that's what you are
------
rachellsumpter------
awwww stop, you're making me blush
Corey Arnold------
That was so dumb what we just said. How pretentious. It's
just a conversation. Everybody's doin' it.
rachell sumpter------
I thought we were joking. Like Bobbybirdman says ..jokes,
jokes, jokes, jokes...
Corey Arnold------
Maybe we should talk more about what this place is like....
Finnmark I mean... OK, I'll start... so we drove and drove
through the Sami lands of the interior and met some nice
reindeer herder people and stayed at this cabin with 40
sled dogs howling off and on through the night.
rachell sumpter------
We met many sami, and you spoke with the king sami reindeer
herder!...then we were invited back for the reindeer
slaughter...yes, the dogs howled into a night without
darkness...they smelled our granola with blueberry liquid
yogurt and peanut butter colored cheese breakfast..I must
be hungry.
Corey Arnold------
Remember when that dog lacerated your arm? I think I
captured that last moment of happiness before that dog just
ripped you to pieces. that was cool. I remember yelling,
"Let me get a shot first...keep smiling... hold on!" So you didn't
really start screaming until after I got my shot and blood started
spurting. That's a nasty word isn't it?... spurting.
rachellsumpter------
...she fed me to her puppies, she was dedicated and I was
laughing not screaming. Spurting is sick, purting is kinda
wierd too but then break it down to urting and its good.
Corey Arnold------
thats like purrr-farting.
rachell sumpter------
Exactly....finally we saw some reigndeer, of course you
went a little wild.
Corey Arnold------
You spelled reindeer wrong... people are going to comment that this
interview is a
disgrace... and we are just trashy urban degenerates...
Like the dude that did the exhibition on ballsacs.
rachell sumpter------
People can say whatever they want...maybe we are trashy
urban degenerates... glowing electric blue trash
degenerates...back to reighndeer crossing! fecal minds want
to know the truth- mr.
Corey Arnold------
What did I do the reindeer crossing the road? Besides try
to run them down. Everybody does that... It's like a game.
Oh, you spelled reindeer wrong... twice.
rachell sumpter------
That's what happens when you get kicked out of high school,
basic skills like spelling and grammer - nonexistent. I'm
gonna have to draw that raindear scene...Are you still
considering a house in vardo next to the mind controlling
lazer beam shooting satellite?...I love vardo, during
twenty four hour darkness the whole town starts playing
norwegian black metal and they have lazer light shows in
the sky...I could see the Vardoians doing that, Mott would
be into it.
Corey Arnold------
Yeah, Vardo is the raddest place in finnmark. Check out
this picture. There is this secret US spy radar station in
town on the island. See how it is obviously CONTROLLING the
weather in the area! But yeah, Vardo is the
Northeasternmost place in Norway and you can see Russia
across the ocean. The town is partially abandoned which
makes for some cheap real estate and some real hardcore
people. You can buy a house there for around $5000... The
official explaination for the radar station overlooking the
town is that it's monitoring weather... but everyone knows
it's spying on russia. It used to have a dome to hide which
way the dish was pointing but it blew off in a bad storm
this winter. Last time it blew off... during the cold
war... it was pointed straight at Russia.... ha!
rachell sumpter------
We spy on you Russia!
Corey Arnold------
Shit, I'm tired of black helicopters showing up at my
doorstep every other day... we shouldn't include that part.
But maybe I have nothing to worry about. The black
helicopters were tracking me when I started draining all
those cows of blood in Idaho back in '89? That was funny...
everyone thought it was the aliens! Russians probably drive
rust colored helicopters.
rachellsumpter------
To match their awesome rust colored trawlers. Okay, I think
were done here. Till next time Mr, leave the death star
running.
Corey Arnold------
Yeah maybe we should wrap this thing up. I'm not sure if
anyone learned anything from this, Sumpnold. We should make
an extra long header paragraph that actually talks about
what we did on the trip and where we went. We didn't even
talk about the icy roads... getting trapped in a pass for 6
hours, running out of gas... The American lady at the diner
in Vardo that made a bird out of the aluminum foil for my
pizza slice doggy bag. Oh, I have a picture! Check it out!
rachellsumpter------
That woman was a character...heck, we never talked about
the king crab that joined us for wine and cigarettes, or
the liquid rock lakes and frequent sightings of kryptonite
knives, or the Hurtigurten spinning out of control, falling
through the ice and landing in yeti land, or how the sami
said they knew I was coming...but were saving that part for
Giant Robots next issue.
Corey Arnold------
And those Norwegians.... an attractive bunch don't you
think? Remember the girl in the cafe... smokin! Then she
turned out to be only 16... and I quickly switches gears
from smokin! to oh, she's a cute girl.
rachell sumpter------
Her last name is Loveland...I'm not kidding folks, and she
was wearing fuchia silk flowers in her hair...so so pretty.
Corey Arnold------
Ok, enjoy that sizzling SF June weather. see you bye.
rachellsumpter------
Okay, bye.
Corey Arnold is a freelance photographer and a crab fisherman reality tv show dude on Discovery's Deadliest Catch. He also contributes regularly to the P.O.T.D. here at Fecalface. You can find more of his work at coreyfishes.com
Rachell Sumpter paints, makes videos and happily
contributes her art and writing to magazines and books when
asked. More of her work can seen at
rachellsumpter.com
{moscomment}
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